A Contest of Manliness
by DarkCrisan366
Summary: This is my very first fanfic in the game of Final Fantasy VIII takes place a week after my crossover fic SeeDs and the BlazBlue. This is my 10-shot gag fic where most of the male characters excluding Laguna Loire are about to compete in a Man of Men: Strength and Endurance Competition. This is Squall's very own gag reel in the story.
1. Prologue

**A/N: **Hello readers, this is DarkCrisan366 and I'm the one behind on making a crossover fic between Final Fantasy VIII and the BlazBlue series. I'm kinda ecstatic whenever I keep looking on the fringe-type of cute guys all the time, I keep admiring it. Anyway, this is my first Final Fantasy VIII fic and it's gonna be just like in my Tekken fics which is a 10-shot fic because a lot of authors somehow they make a one-shot about the characters. Here is my story which are the male Final Fantasy VIII characters except Laguna Loire are gonna compete in a man among men tournament and it's first event in Esthar City and is based on one of the BlazBlue gags in their game.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own the Final Fantasy VIII characters since they're from Square Enix. With the exception from their experiences in the BlazBlue continuity because only one BlazBlue character was mentioned in this 10-shot fic and I also don't own the BlazBlue characters because they belong to Arc Systems. So sit up and enjoy reading.

_**A Contest of Manliness**_

_I'm so glad that Rinoa and I were already permitted to go back to our world, letting our essence in Materia's hands and we continued our relationship during our one week break. Like I already said before, being a commander at Balamb Garden was really rough and I still had a weekend time off to spend free time with her. But for now, I decided to stay at Esthar City with Rinoa by my side to spend my weekend quality time._

At the shopping district at Esthar City, Squall, Rinoa and Ellone are eating snacks as they take a little shopping and Rinoa tries to groom her pet dog Angelo. Therefore, someone actually sending brochures to everyone around in the continent as Ellone picks it up and to see the poster.

"Ooohhh... Rinoa, take a look at this?" Ellone calls Rinoa to see what it is and to her surprise it was a contest which happens to be called "Man of Men: Battle between Strength and Endurance" which is going to be held tomorrow.

"Wow, so it's a battle between guys. It's like a popularity contest."

"I know for sure that any guys can appear to be handsome-looking or much older to participate this contest."

The two girls noticed Squall was with them and he gasped.

"What are you two lookin' at?"

"Squall, maybe you should enter that contest." Ellone said getting eager to let him enter the contest as Rinoa convincing him.

"I think it was the right time for you to participate. You have to show them of how much of a man like yourself is strong."

"Yeah, whatever... I'll pass..."

"Don't be so cold, Squall. It was Uncle Laguna who already announced this contest yesterday." Ellone said scolding him much to his disdain.

"Are you kidding me? Oh dad... not again."

"He's like that when he's frustrated." Rinoa remarked as both girls were giggled.

At the Presidential Palace, Laguna manages to ask Dr. Odine to make some machines for tomorrow's event as Squall, Rinoa and Ellone arrive to visit him as he scowls.

"Dad, are you crazy? You're gonna make this tomorrow's event into a men's battlefield?"

"No, Squall... It's not like you fight in the battlefield." Laguna corrects him and he reveals it. "That event is to test the man's strength and endurance and this is the first festival event in Esthar City. As the president, It was already announced yesterday."

"Strength and Endurance?" Squall said disdainfully as the two girls laugh at his expense.

"Yep..." Laguna smiled to see how his son became disdain about the event he had made as he explains to him. "This is how a real man can tests their pride and dignity if they survive these competitions. Just like how we fell in love with our ladies right here to show our passion."

_Oh my Highness! That's when Rin and I we ended up doing some romantic stuff between us. My dad was so strange to say that. _

"Oh yeah, I got a call from Headmaster Cid and he says that a lot of guys from Balamb Garden are about to participate the event tomorrow and that includes you Squall." Laguna informs him making the latter get blushed in embarrassment.

"Do I have to participate this ridiculous event?"

"Apparently, yes." Laguna answered as the two girls giggled for a moment they were gossiping about him as both looked at him in excitement.

"Squall, you need to do your best tomorrow. The most important is to remember about me." Rinoa tried to cheer him up as Ellone encourages him.

"She's right... you have to show them how a man you turned out to be."

"Fine... I'll just participate the event." Squall reluctantly agrees to the two women as he looked at his father and ask. "Anyway, you're not gonna participate, dad?"

"As the president of Esthar, I can't participate that I announced. Both Kiros and Ward would likely to participate as well."

"Oh brother... this event is going to be messy."

In the middle of the night, Squall couldn't sleep about his father's event as Rinoa is with him who is asleep beautifully. He smiles to see her asleep and he turned and frowns, wanting to know who his opponent was in the event as he thought.

_So my father's announced the first ever tournament between men. Perhaps, I have to know who my opponent is. Not just about we fight at the battlefield, but to test our mettle and our pride as a man._

With that, he finally falls asleep comfortably.


	2. Flaming Heat

**A/N: **Most audience watch this tournament is based of how I watched the WWE live shows at Manila which is their first stop of their Asian Tour. Anyway, this is my first chapter after the prologue. This is how the real battle between men amongs't men and whoever is the strongest man wins to become the king of men. It's like we're watching the King of the Ring.

_**Round 1: **_The Flaming Heat

The first ever tournament was held in a newly built Esthar Battle Dome as most audience can't wait to watch the show. Rinoa and Ellone are watching at the Patron section and it was their first time watching the tournament as Quistis, Selphie, Nida and Xu came to see them just to watch the entire event. Most audience are from Esthar City as well as the people from Fisherman's Horizon. At the stage of the tournament, Squall looked on to see most of the audience and to his surprise, Rinoa is with the girls, much to his dismay and seeing that battle would be a complete mess.

_There's so many audience around this arena. I wouldn't expect this ridiculous tournament._

"Yo, Squall..." Zell arrives to see him who remains stoic. It was the first time he could handle this situations as a participant of the tournament.

"I'd never expect you were my opponent."

"That's my first time here in this tournament. I just wanna show to my friend of mine of how I turned out to be a real man." Zell smiled eagerly as Irvine arrives to see them both, getting confident to win the contest.

"Don't hold back, you two. I know for sure that I would win this competition because a lot of ladies are cheering on me. Besides, didn't you noticed that my former headmaster Martine is the guest commentator in this event?"

"Really?" Zell surprised as Squall ignores their situation.

_Oh brother, I have to battle against these two in whoever endure this kind of obstacles in the competition._

"You three bonkers are gonna compete too." Seifer arrives and chuckles for a moment his rival Squall was there too and alongside with him is Raijin knowing that Fujin is gonna watch this tournament. "I'd like to win this ridiculous tournament and I got a little amused to see my rival just knock a tall guy with a single low blow."

Squall angrily grins for a moment Seifer mentions about the person he had took down for flirting other women but the worst thing the guy had done was his girlfriend Rinoa who is now a sorceress by asking her for a date. Both Kiros and Ward saw all five men are competing in this tournament as well.

"Looks like Squall was motivated about this tournament. Laguna sometimes he tells us to volunteer to enter the first time ever tournament." Kiros tells Ward about the situation which he was confident to win.

"..."

"(Ward says that he might able to beat these five guys. Also other male competitors are here for the tournament too.)" Kiros translates Ward's speech knowing that he wants to win.

As the tournament commences the guest commentators are none other than former Headmaster Martine and the mayor of Fisherman's Horizon Dobe along with them is the President of Esthar Laguna and Dr. Odine.

"...Ladies and Gentlemen boys and girls, children of all ages! Today's the first ever The Man of Men: Strength and Endurance Tournament! Now which one of these men will be taking home the title, "King of Men"!? Bringing this competition to you today is myself, the former Headmaster of Galbadia Garden Martine and..."

"Pacifist mayor of FH, DOBE! Since there's no disputes and fighting, let's start this sausagefest. Let's hear it for all these men amongst the men in this continent! Our guests with is for today is the President of Esthar Laguna Loire and alongside him is Dr. Odine!"

"Our first match since everyone knows it! The HEAT competition." Martine announces the first match as Dobe explains to the participants.

"This match is to test the man's endurance from getting resistant over hot things."

As the participants were surprised about this situation, Raijin was impressed that this competition is going to be fun, Seifer was arrogant to see the explanation.

"So they tried to dunk us with hot water? Quite interesting! But there's no hot springs around in our continent, though."

Martine is ready to convince Dr. Odine to be ready as the first match begins.

"Dr. Odine. Ready to commence."

"Gotcha!" Dr. Odine finally activates the strange machine within this arena to make the participants feel the environment from the inside as Dobe flips the switch.

"Now it's going to flip this switcheroo!"

"Hmmm, I can feel something hot in here, ya know..." Raijin sensed something hot around in the arena as it suddenly begins to burn from the inside. "Gah! What the hell!? This arena is burning all over the place, ya know!"

"Oh man! It's just like we got hit from a Firaga. Are they trying to kill us in here?" Zell complained as Seifer became confident to see the surroundings.

"Don't be ridiculous... this entire arena is like we were inside of a giant sauna from the shower room. Think about it."

Squall feels the entire surroundings inside of the arena was burning as sweat was evaporating from his skin while having his arm crossed. He remembers what his father told him about Dr. Odine machines as he noticed the place looks similar to the boiling room and those temperatures were taken from the climates within their continent. Despite the surroundings however, Irvine was trying to keep up from the heat as he thought of this.

_Great! I guess the four of us are wearing coats and jackets while we were inside of the intense boiling room. Now I finally understand about the machines that Dr. Odine had made for this event. _

Therefore, one of the competitors got collapsed from heat exhaustion much to his surprise and disdain.

_Oh no! If they can't keep up the heat, they would be collapsed from either a heat stroke or a heat exhaustion. I should be more careful._

"You okay, Irvine..."

"Huff huff... yeah, I'm alright. Even these two other guys can keep this up." Irvine replied while he panted in exhaustion as Squall looked at both Kiros and Ward as he commented.

"Seeing the big guy is able to keep it up the heat. But I felt the white fur ruffles from my jacket are about to burn soon."

"Looks like a few of the contenders are made a drop out in the first round." Martine noticed some competitors are collapsed from heat exhaustion as Zell continued to complain from the entire round and Kiros joked about their situations.

"I kinda love to see these guys are able to keep it up. Don't you think, Ward?"

"..."

"Hehe... I'm quite fanatical if the man's inside of them could be way too small but Squall has a different case." Kiros said making fun over the participants.

"I think this is the highest level of a heatwave. It's gonna kill us out here!" Zell complained angrily as Irvine removes his cowboy hat to pose as a fan to cool himself.

"I maybe panted because of the heat... But I won't lose."

Suddenly, the heat disappears inside of the arena and to their shock most other men who were collapsed from heat exhaustion knowing they were eliminated. Martine, Dobe, Laguna and Dr. Odine looked to see other competitors survived the first round.

"It seems that they managed to survive the first round and they will go for the next." Martine announces the survivors of the first round had passed to the next round as Dobe also announces the next round later.

"The second round will be held after a twenty minute interlude."

During the interlude, Squall was given some water by Rinoa who is worried about him as he was visited by Quistis, Selphie and Ellone and they praised him including Zell and Irvine.

"Thanks for the water, Rin."

"No problem, Squall... You will do just fine." Rinoa smiled nicely as Quistis tells them.

"Kinda reminds me when I take him to the Fire Cavern for his field training. That's why he had higher tolerance to heat."

"Ellone can you tell me about the second round?" Selphie wants to know about the second round which Ellone replies in a funny tone.

"I do not know much about the second round. I think Uncle Laguna knows it. When some guys are about to wet their pants in a very cold place."

"..?"

"Uh, Squall... are you okay? You look kinda pale?" Ellone said getting worried to his step-brother as Squall sarcastically retorts.

"Excuse me, I'd rather cool myself off a little bit at the men's comfort room."

As he quickly leaves, Rinoa laughs so hard when he retorted about the next round as both Quistis and Selphie also laughed. Both Zell and Irvine watch the girls laughing.

"What she meant about getting our pants wet?" Irvine asked in confusion which Zell's face became red as a tomato which he grins.

"Maybe if you went to the Trabia continent? You will know about some colder places."

As soon as after the interlude, the second round begins as the participants are ready to commence. Squall frowns to know about Ellone's hint about the second round and became embarrassed when the girls are laughing at him. Ward was looking at the frown look on Squall's face and he smiles knowing he was very determined to make it through the next while Raijin and Seifer are constantly ready to go while Zell, Irvine and the other competitors who survived the first round are also ready. As they feel the cold portion in the arena was activate.

"Huh? After a warm-up in the first and now we are in a middle of a cold compress." Seifer said noticing the next challenge.

"Let's move on for Round 2!"

"This second round was in a depths of winter! Get ready men, feel the breeze of the snow and it's frozen water!"

Most guys are getting ready for the second round. Now who's gonna survive after the heat battle from the first round? Can they survive the challenge?


	3. Winterfell

**_Round 2:_ **Winterfell

"Let's move on for Round 2!"

"This second round was in a depths of winter! Get ready men, feel the breeze of the snow and it's frozen water!"

The arena was covered in fog in a blistering snow and the winds are like a blizzard.

"Brrghhh! How come you three can even survive this kind of a weather, ya know?!" Raijin complained as Seifer calmly replies.

"Guess you're not so lucky, Raijin."

"Irvine, if we had extra jackets, we can survive this blizzard, brghhh..." Zell was chilling in cold as Irvine was having his arm crossed. Kiros was watching them while having his arm crossed as Ward tries to hold on because of the cold.

"You will do just fine, Ward. Even the younger men can even hold it much longer."

"..."

"Oh, you mean Squall." Kiros noticed Squall was standing there observing the other participants and was surprised that he was chilling in cold just like both Raijin and Zell as he smirks. "He was very determined than I thought. I wonder what's in store for him?"

Squall looked at both Raijin and Zell are chilling in cold due to the blizzard and he noticed something was missing despite wearing his main clothes everyday. Just because of the hint that Ellone had meant earlier as he thought.

_Despite both Irvine and Seifer are lucky to survive the blistering cold. But what about me, I'm already wearing a jacket. _

Squall continues to breathe as he put his right hand on his right hip and to his shock, his white v-neck shirt just reach through his waist which is why he was chilling in cold much to his frustration.

_Dang, my shirt only reaches through my waist. Just like when Seifer and I had a duel before we got our scars on our faces a year ago. Urgh... I can feel the cold on my back._

"I'm not prepared of this cold endurance. But I won't lose this..." Squall said in a frustration tone while trying to move around the arena having his arm crossed as Raijin noticed his lower back was exposed from his shirt when he walks away as he lightly giggles.

"Hehehe... your back's kinda freezin', ya know."

"Just because my back got exposed does it mean that I will be lose by this, fnnng!" Squall angrily retorts over Raijin's remarks which Zell calmly tells him.

"Uhhh... I think you're becoming sensitive, Squall."

"I just can't lose too, but I'm starting to fall asleep..." Irvine said as he remembers Selphie, waking him up, "!? Oh yeah... I won't lose because Sefie and Quisty are trying to cheer upon me!"

"Dream on, you idiots... this really takes me to longer heights when we were inside of a freezer. But for Squall, he's not man enough to show his real man's endurance." Seifer horribly remarks on the trio as Squall raising his brow.

"Well oh well... seems like they were surviving the entire second round. But it looks like everyone's heading into the next round." Dobe said noticing their survival in the cold as Martine tells him.

"Speaking of the next round, this third round will be much more feared, folks. These critters are known in the Shumi Village. But the third round will be commence in a thirty minute interlude."

During the interlude while at the locker room, Raijin tries to make a hot compress after enduring the cold in the second round, Seifer was glad he made it this far, wanting to get the title of King of Men. Both Zell and Irvine are trying to use Fire magic to warm themselves up while Squall was watching them from afar as he sneezes and became disappointed to see himself in a bad condition.

"I don't believe it, now I'm starting to get sick. But I have to win this tournament." Squall mumbled as Rinoa visits him.

"Are you okay, Squall?"

"I'm fine, Rin... I just want to be alone for a while." Squall answered coldly which she noticed something was wrong with him as she touches his face and seeing that he was burning up.

"I think you're burning up after enduring the second round. You have to-."

"Shhh! I hate if my opponents or my dad knows that I'm sick." Squall tries to keep Rinoa's mouth shut and he whispers her. "I like to win this tournament because I wanted to win it for you. Even Irvine was being supported by Quistis and Selphie."

"That's means, you're gonna continue to participate." Rinoa whispered in a worry.

"I really hate if Seifer remarks of me being so weak and fragile. I know for sure he would get clobbered by the Moombas." Squall whispered to Rinoa about the Moombas which he gives her the hint of the third round.

"Are you saying the critters in the third round are Moombas?"

"Yeah... they are, achoo." Squall whispered to her while he sneezes.

As more audience are ecstatic to see the third round of the competition as Quistis noticed Rinoa arrives just to visit Squall at the locker room.

"How's the boys?"

"They were fine, don't worry... That icy competition gives them some chills."

"SERIOUSLY!?" Fujin remarks to the girls about the second round.

"Finally you spoke to us, Fujin." Selphie said happily as Fujin responded in a comment.

"Raijin and Seifer are just being buttheads to win this tournament. They don't even know what kind of a competition they entered. Trying to show up their arrogance because of their masculinity."

The girls laugh because Seifer and Raijin are just showing their arrogance over the other three until thirty minutes interlude is over as both Martine and Dobe are about to commence the third round.

"We're back here in the first ever Man of Man: Strength and Endurance competition and this round will be much more feared unlike the previous two rounds."

"All right, boys... you better prepare yourselves because these little critters are about to pin all of you down and get some ticklish treatment."

"Much feared... what is that supposed to mean?" Zell noticed something as it begins to quake.

"Oh my Hyne! Is that an earthquake?" Irvine said shockingly about their surroundings.

"Get ready, Ward... cause this third round is gonna get you some cuchi-cuchi treatment." Kiros said preparing Ward for the worst as he shrugs.

"I knew my dad would be let these critters to come out." Squall mumbled and knowing a single Moomba showed up as he pretended it knocks him down as it confronted the participants.

"Hah! I knew Squall was too weak to get knocked out so easily. What a baby? Just like I keep interrogating you at the torture room within the prison back there." Seifer continued to taunt Squall about this as more Moombas are coming through the arena.

With that, Squall was just pretending he was knocked out so badly as he gets up and sit on the ground, watching them getting clobbered by the Moombas as he happily thought.

_I maybe rescued by these critters before. But now I know..._

* * *

**A/N: **Didn't you noticed Squall's white v-neck shirt from his original outfit just reach through his waist as it appears to be a midriff? Which is why his lower back was exposed, lol. In Dissidia however, his other shirt is no longer reach in the waist as it appears to be a loose shirt which was tucked in. That's the difference... Okay, this next chapter will be a continuation because the third round was a free for all chaos.


	4. Moombas

_**Round 3:**_ Moombas

With that, Squall was just pretending he was knocked out so badly as he gets up and sit on the ground, watching them getting clobbered by the Moombas as he happily thought.

_I maybe rescued by these critters before. But now I know..._

When the comical music plays, he noticed a Moomba just confront him while the rest of them are trying to corner him long enough to make him tickle into the ground as they ganged up on him on purpose, much to his disdain. He slowly tried to get away from the creatures as he sneezes. Both Irvine and Zell are getting tickled by most of the Moombas while Seifer is trying to get away from them.

"Please, get away from me. I'm ordering you to stay away!"

Despite his pleas, he was ganged up by the Moombas. Both Kiros and Ward watch the chaotic scene while being tickled by them, thinking they were giving a massage. Squall tried to escape the premises knowing a sick man like he is will not last. Until, another Moomba confronted him, much to his dismay and behind him were the rest of the Moombas as they ganged on him once again, trying to knock him down until, he sneezes. The Moombas are confused to see him sneeze and thinking he was allergic to them. Once he sneezes again, the Moombas quickly flees the scene as Squall was covering his nose with both of his hands while looking at the creatures flee as he thought in relief.

_Phew, that was close..._

"Well it looks like we had a first drop out of this third round, folks. And this arena turns into a free for all chaos." Martine finally declares Seifer being eliminated in the third round as most of the audience give them a round of applause.

"Not just about getting yourself being ticklish by these creatures. Sometimes people would even think of getting them a full body massage." Dobe jokily tells them.

Both Zell and Irvine felt they were having a full body massage knowing that the Moombas don't show their claws. Squall manages to find them in a desperate situation and seeing them getting dog piled by the Moombas, much to his disdain.

"Squall, you looked pretty tense?" Irvine noticed how troubled he was which he tries keep them quiet.

"Take it easy, man. These critters are harmless." Zell said smirking as the Moombas are approaching him knowing he could get away if they tried to ganged up on him.

"Just be quiet... I already tried to get away from..." Squall glared at both of them as one of the Moomba is behind him as the rest of them are trying to climbing all over him. One of the Moombas begins to tickle his ribs, much to his shock until he was forced to laugh from their tickles. "!? Hey hey...!? not on my...! Ahahahahaha!"

"Irvine, does Squall had some funny bones? He didn't told us about this." Zell asked which Irvine shrugs.

"Don't know... I've ever seen he laughs so loud. He never laughs when he get serious on missions and acting unfriendly to us."

The Moombas continued to tickle him further which he had thought of this as he continued to laugh so hard.

_Okay okay, you got me... But I don't want to lose this competition. _

After the competition which is in fifteen minute interlude, Squall was cleaning his bomber jacket with a fur roller due to the Moomba's fur being stick. He was relieved that he can survive the third round and the Moombas don't reveal their claws just by climbing over and tickling him on purpose as he thought.

_Those Moombas really got me this time. But their fur just ruined both my jacket and pants. Anyway, I feel a little hungry after all these rounds._

After he's done, he finally put his bomber jacket back on and he was confronted by Kiros and Ward who also made it through the next round.

"I'm quite impressed you can survive the entire rounds, Squall."

"..."

"Yeah... Dr. Odine's machines are really intense. I can only imagine about the Moombas mistook me as my dad." Squall replied plainly as Ward looked at his eyes and seeing he was serious to participate in the tournament.

"..."

"Ward says that the next round will be an eating competition. Best of luck..." Kiros translates Ward's speech.

"An eating competition?" Squall became confused as his stomach growls making him blush in embarrassment. "Now I feel so hungry after you told me about this."

"Don't be worry... Here in Esthar City they have lots of exquisite food to be prepared for this tournament and that also includes one of the famous delicacies in this continent which is the Balamb Fish." Kiros informs him about the food prepared for the competition as Squall immediately recognized the dish.

"That's the fish when Rinoa and I ate lunch during our stay at the Balamb Hotel. I'd never seen that dish was included in the tournament."

"I believe your friends would try it soon." Kiros smiled as he leaves with Ward. Squall watches them and knowing that Ward was also serious in the tournament until he sneezes.

As everyone takes a little break in the snack area, Fujin arrives to see them and became disappointed to see Seifer lost in the third round.

"...HUNGRY."

"Here some burger, Fujin." Selphie gave her some burger as she thankfully responds.

"THANK YOU."

"How's Seifer doing, Fujin?" Quistis asked which she coldly replies.

"He's inside the men's comfort room, trying to let out his frustrations for losing the competition."

"That's pretty bad for him." Quistis commented as Fujin tells them.

"Now Raijin is still in the tournament. I bet he could win this too."

Back at the arena, both Martine and Dobe finally commences the fourth round of the tournament.

"This next round will be an eating competition. Don't worry about it, folks. The food is very exquisite. But don't get yourselves in a jiffy or over eating."

"So what food for the competition to be sent, President Laguna?" Martine asked as Laguna answered in a laid-back tone.

"It's simple... it was the dishes being prepared to me in my everyday duties as president of this city. I also includes the Balamb Fish dish. I guess this competition will be a one hell of a buffet."

"All right, Let's commence this fourth round!" Martine finally commences the fourth round as the participants are ready to eat for the competition. Squall looked on to see his opponents as his stomach continues to growl knowing he was getting hungry as he thought.

_I'm so hungry... What kind of a dish they're gonna prepared for us? It's not like we frequently __eat the exact meals at the cafeteria in Balamb Garden. I just hoped we don't eat some of the dishes were not so good. _

With that most Estharian soldiers prepare the meals for the competitors as the fourth round begins.


	5. Eat Responsibly

**A/N: **On this round was an eating competition it's like you're eating in the buffets at the restaurants. But the next round would be very surprising and deadly. Here is the next chapter of this gag.

_**Round 4:** _Eat Responsibly

With that most Estharian soldiers prepare the meals for the competitors as the fourth round begins. They gave them an exquisite food for the participants to eat which surprises them.

"Wow! This is a raw steak...!" Zell said amusing to see the exquisite food, letting both Squall and Irvine to scold him.

"There's no time to get amused about some exquisite food. They prepare this for the eating competition."

"He's telling the truth, if you dig in then so it's us."

"Come on, you two... didn't you know this round had already commenced?" Zell said as he finally chomps the food and both forgot about it was already begun as the comical music background was played the entire scene.

They actually enjoy the food which they never tried these kinds of dishes in Esthar City. Ward is doing his best to eat as soon as possible and he wanted to win this tournament. Both Irvine and Zell stopped as their stomachs are a little full but in Squall's case he continues to eat.

"Nom nom nom... I didn't expect my dad can eat all of this. Not like we always eating at the cafeteria these days."

"It's because of our long fights and training. It brings us all day long." Zell gleefully smiles as the trio noticed Kiros couldn't eat it much longer.

"Oh dear me... now I can't take it anymore."

"..."

As Kiros collapses from defeat, Ward gets his food and eats it, much to both of their shock and surprise.

"Zell, can you translate of what the big guy says?" Irvine requests Zell to translate Ward's speech which he tells him.

"The big guy says, if you keep eating way too much, you would get sick. How can you win this tournament, if you had a very large stomach to make it full."

"Wait, if both of us were eating at the competition in this average?" Irvine realizes both could eat normally since they were resting until they saw Squall drinks water after he eats the main dishes without eating rice, much to their surprise.

"Gladly, Squall does have an iron stomach. I can't believe he's trying to compete against the big guy." Zell was impressed of seeing their commander wants to challenge Ward.

"My oh my... we had a first drop out on this competition. I think the two of them are doing their best." Dobe finally announces Kiros is out of the competition as Laguna laughs at their expense.

"Haha... sorry, you two. Kiros actually taking balance meals everyday. I think he doesn't want to get overeating. That's why he lost."

During the twenty minute interlude, Squall was in relief after surviving the fourth round as he sneezes and both Zell and Irvine came to see him.

"You were lucky that you got a large stomach, Squall."

"I can't believe you can eat without rice, that's surreal." Zell smiled nicely as Squall tells them.

"I got so hungry after enduring most of the rounds. If we eat with rice, then we're gonna get sick of overeating."

"I don't think you three could not survive in the next round, ya know." Raijin informs the trio about the next round.

"Don't put your arrogance over us, Raijin. What do you mean that we can't survive the next round?" Zell glared angrily at Raijin as he pulls off his battle staff.

"I know for sure, I can absorb any forms of electricity, ya know. Even Squall can even endure this kind of punishment that Seifer had already done to him, ya know."

"Hold on a second, are you saying the next round would be an electrical shock?" Irvine angrily reacted which Raijin demonstrates of his Raijin Special Limit Break but not attacking them as he holds his battle staff.

"It was a warning, you three. I'd say that I can survive this next round if you can, ya know..." Raijin then leaves the scene as Ward watches to see him leave.

"..."

"Uhm, Squall... can you translate the big guy's word again?" Irvine requested as Squall tells him about Ward's speech.

"I think he says he's not going to last long on the next round. If he is saying that he is able to absorb all kinds of electricity and that means, excessing himself with electricity would definitely get him overcharged."

"No way! He knows that!?" Zell gasped in surprise.

"Wait a minute, by the time we liberated Balamb Town and fought him and cast any forms of lightning magic, it could heal himself, right." Irvine said as Ward noticed about Squall's weakness.

"..."

"Uhm, the big guy says... did that guy was saying that Squall had a weakness? And that means his rival just gave him a glutton for punishment." Zell said while translating Ward's speech making the latter rudely walks away.

"If you guys were talking about me, then so be it..."

"..."

"I think you strike a nerve on him, big guy." Irvine said and Ward watches him leave.

As soon as the next round will about to commence both Martine and Dobe are making fun about this next tournament as both Dr. Odine and Laguna was with them.

"Our next round will be very heinous and dirty. I really hate to see the men of my village who got themselves being toasted from getting electrocuted."

"According to Martine, this electricity was taken from the Galbadian D-District Prison and this machine will be used for today's round." Dr. Odine explains about the machine used for the next round.

"I know me and Fury were the ones to interrogate the prisoners from the interrogation room within that prison." Martine said this in disappointment as Dobe announces.

"The next round will be an Electrical Hell!"

Inside the arena, a gush of purple electricity flowing over to the ground. Could the participants survive the entire next round. Find out on the next chapter of this gag fic because this will be a deadly thunder would strike them all out.

"Arrrrghhhh..."


	6. Electrical Hell

_**Round 5: **_Electrical Hell

"Arrrrghhhh..." Squall screams in anguish when everyone got shocked by a purple electricity as he hurtfully comments. "This is just like...I was tortured inside of the interrogation room..."

"Gyayayayahhhh! This is to-to-too much!" Zell screams in agony as Irvine replies in a hurtful manner.

"Agyagyagyagya...It's so sh-sh-sh-shocking!"

When the music plays, Raijin looked to see them hurt from the electricity and he boasts them long enough because he is able to absorb any forms of electricity.

"You three bimbos... got yourselves being toasted. I knew the three of you can't survive, ya know."

"..."

"What are you talkin' about, big man? Are you able to resist this kind of a torture, ya know?" Raijin could not understand what Ward meant about as Squall translates his speech while writhing in pain.

"If keep overexerting from absorbing electricity... and that means you would get yourself be...overloaded."

"Nonsense! I won't get- Wha-!? What's going on? No no...Any more absorption of electricity and my body will... WAHHHHH!"

Raijin eventually got exploded himself due to being overloaded as Ward smiles to see him knocked down despite the pain.

"Ughhh... I smell a burning charcoal..." Zell commented badly to Raijin as he hurtfully replies.

"Darn... I'm sorry Seifer and you two Fujin, I failed, ya know..." Raijin then knocked unconscious in defeat as Squall watches while he was still in pain while clutching his gut during the electrical shock.

"It looks like another drop out on this round and it seems that we've narrowed it down to the final four!" Martine finally declared Raijin was eliminated in the competition.

"The final four who made it this round, they will be go on to the semi-finals!" Dobe announces the final four had reach through the semi-finals.

After the round the electricity shock soon stops and the trio became relieved that it was over knowing that they make it through the semi-finals.

"Finally..."

"We made it through..."

"That was relief..."

With that the trio faintly collapses into the ground as Ward eventually sits down due to their current state. During the thirty minute interlude, Squall slowly wakes up in a locker room being magically treated by Rinoa using Esuna to remove all negative status effects as he gained a paralysis during the fifth round and became relieved to see her doing it.

"You will do just fine, Squall."

"Thanks, Rinoa. You're a lifesaver..." Squall replied nicely to her which she scolds him in a worry.

"Are you crazy? You got electrocuted so badly during that round. I feel worried so much about you if you ended up getting toasted inside of the arena."

"It's okay... At least we managed to get through the semi-finals." Squall smirked happily as he gets up to see both Zell and Irvine are treated by both Quistis and Selphie by using Esuna which Rinoa becomes worry to his current state.

"Squall, are you sure you can make it through this? What about your condition?"

"Oh yeah... when you treated me with Esuna and other kinds of healing magic, it does not work on my sickness, achoo." Squall finally realizes any healing magic including Esuna does not work on him when he was sick and became disappointed about his situation.

"How long can you tell them about this?"

"I'll tell them later once this competition is over." Squall regretfully said as he looked at Ward who is also afflicted with paralysis as he tells her. "Could you treat the big guy for me? He also got a paralysis too."

As Rinoa goes to treat Ward with Esuna, he happily looked at her knowing that she was worried for him as he thought.

_Guess I'm too stubborn to continue. I already made it this far, I have to win this tournament._

Before the participants to enter the sixth round in the semi-finals, both Martine and Dobe wants to know from Laguna about this entire round.

"Before we start the semi-final round, the president of Esthar would like to say something about this sixth round."

"Ahem, this sixth round would be very interesting. This is what a real strength and endurance is all about. This round for the semi-finals will be the Eliminator! Dr. Odine activate the machine to recreate inside this arena."

"I'm on it, sir..." Dr. Odine activates the machine as the interior of the arena transforms into an obstacle ground to the surprise of both Martine and Dobe.

"Amazing! This is just like a military obstacle course."

"All right, this semi-final round will be an Eliminator and we'll introduced the final four participants!" Dobe finally commences the final four and the audience was given a round of applause as Martine introduced them.

"Introducing first, my former student in Galbadia Garden where I was formerly headed and being recruited by SeeD mercenaries from Balamb Garden, Irvine Kinneas!"

"He's one of the SeeD mercenaries from Balamb Garden who loves hotdogs and fights in barefists, Zell Dincht!" Dobe introduces two of the final four as both Zell and Irvine appears the scene making the audience cheer them on which Selphie cheers upon them both.

"I'd say one of my fellow companions who aided my duties as president is Ward Zabac and my son who is now the commander of Balamb Garden, Squall Leonhart!" Laguna finally introduces both which they cheer upon them.

As soon as everyone cheers for them, they got excited while Squall remains standoffish when it comes to the competition.

"I'm impressed we made it to the final four."

"This would be a semi-final challenge."

"..."

"I'm not good on being cheered on with many people."

"Get on with it, Squall... you're being cold sometimes. You have to enjoy the competition." Zell scolds him until both announcers are ready to commence the sixth round.

"All right, folks... we have a tournament bracket in whoever participates first. This will be chosen randomly" Martine informs the audience about the random choosing of the bracket as he called upon Dr. Odine. "Dr. Odine, click it away."

"I'm on it!" Dr. Odine presses the button as they watched the bracket being choose randomly as it confirms the fight bracket in the Eliminator. Irvine had to face Ward while Squall has to face Zell.

"Well what do you know? the cowboy guy had to face the big man from Esthar while the other two youngsters going head-to-head in this Eliminator challenge." Dobe remarked their appearance in the challenge as Irvine needs to face Ward on the Eliminator

"Well big guy, the best of luck between us."

"..."

"Ward says that you do your best too." Squall translates Ward's speech which Zell became confident in facing him in that semi-finals.

"Looks like we're enemies in that Eliminator match up. And this is no longer an endurance competition. It seems that this challenge it's like we're taking a cross fit challenge. I can't wait to beat you, Squall."

"Fair by me... I don't wanna lose this contest too." Squall smirked nicely to him and became confident to battle.

With that both of them watch Irvine and Ward are ready to compete each other in the semi-finals. Now who's going to pass up this competition.


	7. Eliminator: Part 1

**_Round 6:_ **Eliminator: Part 1

Both Irvine and Ward are ready to take their challenge in the semi-finals as both Squall and Zell watch. Both Martine and Dobe would now explain the instructions of this round.

"These two people are about to participate in the eliminator, Martine can you tell us about the instructions."

"All right, just like the president of Esthar had said since he was the former Galbadian soldier, The Eliminator starts by running through this treadmill if you're good enough to run faster. Next is to pass through the monkey bars will lead to the balance beam. But watch out, these critters are the ones gonna throw something at you while you balanced. Then, climb into the rope-like ladder and going to the zip-line to make a landing fall. There was a small maze where these critters are going to ambush you and the finish line will be the end of this maze. Whoever the participants made it to the finish line, they will make to the final two."

"All right, men... let this semi-final round begin!"

As it finally commences, both Irvine and Ward runs through the treadmill as Irvine got slipped a little while trying to catch him up despite the latter's size. They picked up the pace by taking on the monkey bars, balancing on the beam and climbing through the rope-ladder and make it through the zip line. Ward makes way through the maze as Irvine almost catching up to him but he made it to the finish line.

"Would you look at that!? the big man beats the cowboy! What an astounding match?!" Martine declares Ward passes through the final two as Irvine was eliminated.

"You got me, big guy. I'd never expect that you're great."

"..." Ward both made a handshake in respect as both Squall and Zell congratulates him.

"You did great, Irvine."

"So it was true then... Ward was a former Galbadian soldier after all."

"..." Ward thumbs up at Squall who is next to participate as Zell challenges him.

"I guess it's just you and me, Squall. I'm not going to get easy on you just because you're our commander at the Garden."

"Just because you're my comrade does it mean I would be go easy on you." Squall immediately accepts the challenge.

At the infirmary of Balamb Garden, Raijin was treated his injuries by Dr. Kadowaki as both Seifer and Fujin became disappointed after what happened to him in the fifth round of the competition.

"Looks like his injuries are serious. Don't tell me is it because of the excess of elemental absorption?"

"Uhhh... please, doc... I admit that I'm such an arrogant idiot. Trying to boast on the four guys until this, ya know." Raijin admits about what happened as Seifer and Fujin scolds him for his recklessness.

"You reckless moron... just because your immunity to lightning does it mean that you can successfully make it to the semi-finals. Now look what happened to you, you got exploded from getting excessive on absorbing electricity!"

"...RAGE!"

Back at the arena, Ward likes to watch how both Squall and Zell to compete in the Eliminator as Kiros arrives to see him.

"Congratulations on beating one of Squall's comrades. You better good luck and see who your opponent at the finals."

"..."

"I see... you like to watch the entire match if either of those two can win this competition." Kiros finally knows Ward likes to see in which the other two would make it in the finals.

Both Martine and Dobe are ready to announce the battle between Zell and Squall as the two are ready to face each other.

"And now, both men are ready to engage in the Eliminator. Who's going to make it into the last spot of the final two."

"The most important thing is when it comes into a sports competition is health. Exercise is also a good part of the health.

Zell is confident to beat Squall at the Eliminator and he gives him a gloom look as he thought.

_He's still my friend, though. But I won't lose this competition. I already made it this far... Despite my bad condition, I have to be serious in winning this. For Rinoa's sake._

"All right, boys... get ready your positions and let the battle begin!" Dobe finally commence the battle between Squall and Zell.

Now both SeeDs are going head-to-head in this eliminator could Squall win this match?


	8. Eliminator: Part 2

**_Round 7:_ **Eliminator: Part 2

As the battle between the two men is now commenced and they're off. They tried their best to run as Squall manages to get through the top of the treadmill and go for the monkey bars, Zell is doing his best to catch him even getting hit by some of the obstacles. Climbing into the rope-like ladder then taking a zip-line to make a drop.

_Luckily it has a cushion..._

Upon reaching in the maze, he tries to dodge the Moombas who serves as gladiators in the arena to attack. Zell tried to catch him but fails when one of the Moombas blocks his way as Squall goes into the finish line, winning the match.

"Well well... it's looks like Leonhart beats Dincht in the Eliminator. That was a good match for both of these men." Martine announces Zell being eliminated as Squall advances through the finals.

Zell was frustrated after he was eliminated at the semi-finals which Squall cheers him up.

"Cheer up, Zell. There is a next year for this."

"I try to catch up to you and you're running so fast." Zell said while lowering his head as he tells him.

"You try to catch up to me while the Moombas just caught you off guard. Maybe if we had this at the Balamb Garden Training Center, we could always be trained like this."

"You mean it, Squall!"

"Of course I do... If I could propose to my dad about this." Squall smirked and both given a friendly handshake in respect.

"Well there you have it, ladies and gentlemen! The entire competition have now drawn to a close. With that, these two men are finally reach through the finals." Martine finally announces about the finals as Dobe replied.

"The finals will be commenced after a thirty minute interlude."

During the interlude, both men were happy after the semi-finals until they were reunited by Irvine and the girls as Rinoa hugged Squall for making through the finals.

"Congratulations, Squall... I'm so happy for you."

"Yeah yeah... I just made it through." Squall smiled as Irvine was surprised that Zell got nailed in the Eliminator. Therefore both Kiros and Ward came to see them and they congratulated him.

"You did a good job on the Eliminator, Squall. You definitely nailed it..."

"..."

"Uhm, could you translate what this big guy had to say?" Irvine requested Kiros to translate his speech which he does.

"Ward says that he was glad Squall can make it through the finals. Because the finals would be a lot more tricky."

"How do you say it was tricky?" Quistis asked as Kiros informs them.

"Laguna sometimes he always got into his head lately. He wishes to have a water park in this city."

"A water park, sounds cool." Zell smiled eagerly wants to try to swim at the water park as Squall became dismay upon hearing this as he thought.

_My dad was really strange. Does that mean the finals that me and Ward are gonna compete, in a watery place? I hate if my jacket gets ruined._

"Quite frankly, Laguna is going to announce this after the thirty minute break." Kiros informs them about the finals as Ward gestures about entering inside the arena.

"..."

"Ward says you people can enter inside of this arena to watch the entire finals. Surely, you will see the view of it."

"If Squall participates in the finals then I would love to see how my rival gets humiliated." Seifer arrives along with Fujin and Squall gives him a dirty look. Unfortunately, he was kicked in the butt by Fujin.

"IDIOT!"

"What was that for?"

"You're such a butthead. We came back in the arena to watch the finals and now you tried to taunt Squall after you and Raijin got lost in the tournament." Fujin immediately scolds him for his bullying.

"Hah! That's Fujin for you, Seifer." Zell laughs to see them making the latter get mad.

After the thirty minute interlude, both Martine and Dobe decided to commence the final round of the competition as Squall and the group arrive inside the arena while Kiros, Ward, Seifer and Fujin are on the other side.

"All right folks! This is the moment we have all been waiting for! The final round!"

"This final round would be a lot more fun than the Eliminator!" Laguna finally decided to reveal the challenge for the final round. "Dr. Odine, hit it!"

"Yes, sir!" Dr. Odine presses the button and the interior of the arena forms a long-wided balance beam that lifts through the third feet of the ground and the entire arena floors revealed the clear waters that resembles a swimming pool which was concealed through the floorings as the water begins to splash the entire beam similar to the water slides.

Everyone is surprised about the entire arena turns into a water-like park and it was the first time Squall has to face his opponent inside of it.

"So Laguna... this is the first time I've seen this entire round becomes a water park." Martine was impressed to see this round as Laguna replies.

"I'd wish to construct a water park in this city. But for now, I'd like to test this obstacle course would work."

"All right... the final round will be WET AND WILD!" Dobe announces the final round will be wet and wild.

Everyone is cheering upon the final round as they were surprised to see the battle of the finals would be getting wet and wild.

"Wow! I can't believe the finals will be wet and wild!" Selphie said amusing as Zell was excited to see the entire battle.

"No way... this is the first time Squall has to fight inside through the water park arena. I can't wait to see how he battles the big guy inside there!"

"Hmph... just like how you kicked Raijin through the ocean, Fujin." Seifer commented as Fujin smiles.

Squall was surprised that he's gonna face Ward at the finals inside the arena at the water park theme as he horribly thought of this.

_Dang, I have to face Ward while getting washed up inside of this arena. So that's what he says about this battle will be very tricky._

"Good luck on that, Squall. Basically, the fight is just like you were competing in a swimming competition." Kiros gives him the best of luck.

"Wait a second, does this mean that we get all washed up wearing like this?" Squall reacted in protest as Ward finally took off his combat boots knowing the fight is going to be messy.

"..."

"Ward says... You need to face him in barefoot. When it comes to wet and wild, despite wearing your everyday outfit. You have to fight him in barefoot since you and him are gonna balanced in that long-wided balance beam."

"..."

"Yes, Laguna will explain the rules once you get inside."

Squall became dismayed knowing that he hates getting washed up as his friends came along. He looked at Rinoa who is cheering for him while lowering his head in disdain.

"Come on, man... we're gonna cheer for you. Besides, you hate getting washed up because of the jacket you wore." Zell cheered him up and he knows how precious the bomber jacket that Squall was wearing.

"Well if that fights goes on like this and the girls would cheer for you." Irvine decided to support him as both Quistis and Selphie did the same as Rinoa tells him.

"Just listen to your friends, Squall. I know you're worried because you wanted to win this tournament. I'm counting on you."

Squall had no other choice but to accept Rinoa's words and he looked at Ward who is ready to face him and he became totally dismayed since the battle of the finals will be very messy as he reluctantly took off his bomber jacket as well as both his gloves and his boots and they were happy to see him getting prepared.

"Zell, can you put my things at the Presidential Palace?"

"Right on schedule, Squall." Zell salutes as he gets his things and leaves the arena to go to the Presidential Palace.

"Good luck on the finals, Squall." Selphie happily supports him as well as Kiros.

"I hope you can beat Ward."

As soon as both competitors are ready to battle, both Martine and Dobe are ready to commence the final round of the tournament as both hanged into the balance beam as Squall feels the water from the beam is clear and warm when he walks in barefoot as he now faces Ward in the finals. Now the battle of the finals is about to begin.


	9. Wet and Wild: Part 1

**A/N: **This is the moment of the final round of this competition. Just like I've done for SeeDs and the BlazBlue, it's going to be a mix between the background musics of Final Fantasy VIII and the background musics in the BlazBlue series. This also includes more original music in the 90's and late 00's party songs are about to play as background musics. (The themes will be The stage is set and Bullet Dance.) This next chapter will be the first end game of this 10-shot fic.

_**Round 8:** _Wet and Wild: Part 1

When the stage is set is played, the commence of the final round is about to begin as Martine wants to know from everyone about the explanation of the rules from Laguna.

"All right, folks. Before we commence this final round, the president of Esthar will explain the rules in this last round."

"Since these two competitors are taking balance on the long-wided balance beam while in barefoot, this obstacle course resembles to that of a water park and the beam itself is made of plastic pipes used for the water slides as the flooring resembles the fiber glass so that they won't get slipped on the water floors. The rules are simple, you have to push the opponent or tackling them down to make them lose the balance in order to get them fall into the clear waters similar to the swimming pool. The rules for swimming is easy, I know they acquired to wear swimsuits whether men or women to swim especially if they can wear white tank tops or shirts as well. Whoever gets knocked down into the clear waters, will be crowning the title of King of Men."

"All right, now let's commence the battle! Uhm, Laguna, would you do the honors." Martine finally commences the final round as Laguna will take an execution.

"I clearly forgot, to make things wet and wild as the final two remains dry in their everyday clothes. They should get washed up like in a shower. Dr. Odine, hit it!"

"Yes, sir!" Dr. Odine clicks the switch as the entire roof activates a multiple of sprinklers to make it rain inside the arena.

When the song Bullet Dance has been played, Squall easily noticed they got washed up by the water from the sprinklers which is enough for them to get them wet as Ward likes to confront him since he was taller than he is and thinking it was easy for him to eliminate him in the finals. Both of them confront each other as both of their blue eyes sharpen knowing they were getting serious. Ward strikes first as Squall dodges by lifting both hands from his large shoulders and quickly tackles him from behind to make him tripped into the beam.

"!"

"Wow... you seem to be tough, big guy. It's gonna take time for me to make a big push on you." Squall became amused to see how Ward endures the tackle as he continued to charge him trying to grapple him out while dodging his movement.

Irvine, Quistis, Selphie, Rinoa and Kiros are watching the scene and they were surprised to see the entire surroundings.

"Look at them go, their fight looks just like they were inside the water park."

"Yep, that's how the battle goes." Kiros said calmly as Rinoa became more worry for Squall to win the tournament.

"I hope Squall can keep this up."

Ward tries to catch him just to throw him out of the clear waters. But he slides beneath him as he tackles him, almost losing his balance.

"..."

"You mean to tell me that you can't catch me." Squall noticed his speech as he seriously tells him. "I guess you cannot catch me because of your heavy size."

"!"

Ward angrily tries to tackle him due to his remarks as he blocks both of his hands as he slips as he hangs on the beam in both hands. Ward tries to step both of his hands as Squall tries to avoid it and he climbs up and tackles him back to the platform which he nearly loses his balance through the beam which he slips into the beam, not to get fall while hurting his butt.

"..."

"Ward says that even you're a gunblade wielder can keep up with big man like me. Cause I can throw you out like a harpoon." Kiros translates Ward's speech as Irvine and Quistis wanted to know about his speech.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I think he became intimidated because Squall has the upper hand. He tries to get him but he's too fast." Kiros noticed how intimidated Ward is.

"Looks like he wanted to win." Quistis commented until Zell and Ellone arrive.

"Sorry to keep you, guys. Ellone just wanted to come with me to watch the arena after I put Squall's things on his room at the Presidential Palace."

"How's Squall doing? Is he already at the finals?" Ellone wants to know about if Squall reaches through the finals as Rinoa confirms it.

"He's already at the finals, confronting Ward inside of that arena."

"Wow... really. He's facing Ward." Ellone eagerly wants to see him battle.

When both tries to confront each other seeing that Squall has the upper hand, Ward tries to make a move while the latter does the same by grabbing both of their hands, gripping each other while the two gritted in whoever is the strongest. But Squall outsmarts him long enough as he tackles him causing Ward to lose his balance.

"..."

"Not bad..."

Ward tries to catch him long enough as he dodges most of his catches as Ward tackles him. He was lucky that he does not slipped into the beam. When he is about to catch him, he soon dodges from behind. Without warning, he got slipped while landing on the beam in both of his legs, hurting his crotch while getting excruciating in pain.

"It looks like the two competitors got equally matched. But Leonhart got hurt in a process." Martine was surprise to see the entire finals was a very good match.

"Is Squall all right?" Rinoa wondered as Ellone nudges at her to see both Zell and Irvine got cried while laughing over the entire scene.

"Owww!"

"Please Hyne have mercy on us!"

"Hahahahaha!" Seifer laughs at his rival's expense as he commented about Squall's current status. "Now that's what I called a low blow."

"Oh be quiet..." Fujin tries to shut him up.

When Ward is about to catch him off after this, Squall dodges and quickly tackles him and he's back on his feet while hurting himself in a process, clutching his crotch as he painfully thought.

_That pretty smarts... I felt that I got a low blow._

"..." Ward tries to use sign language in order to communicate with Squall knowing how painful he was in the match.

"I can't understand what you mean, big guy?"

"..."

"I think Ward says that he need to sit up a little bit." Kiros translates Ward's speech to them.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Rinoa asked which Kiros laughs knowing it was merely a personal man's talk as he mildly scolds her.

"Ahem, young lady... it's a man's privacy. You don't have to ask me anything about this."

"?!"

Squall had no idea what Ward was trying to tell him in sign language until he finally understand what he means.

"You mean to tell me that, I'm gonna sit around and do nothing?" Squall angrily reacted on his actions which Ward tries to inform him because of what happened earlier until his cheeks became rosier knowing he hurts his crotch and finally admits it. "Uhhh... I finally know what you mean. You make me sit and rest up because I accidentally slip myself and lands on my crotch. It's really painful to hurt my pride as a man."

"..."

"Oh I see... If I got recovered a little then we continue our exciting match." Squall finally translates Ward's speech knowing of his current condition.

"..."

With that, Squall finally sits down and looked at Ward and seeing that he wanted to make the competition into an exciting battle. The confrontation between them continues.


	10. Wet and Wild: Part 2

**_Round 9: _**Wet and Wild: Part 2

Ward tries to tell Laguna with the use of sign language as he is one of the guest commentators along with Martine, Dobe and Dr. Odine.

"It seems that Zabac was trying to tell us something." Dobe said as Laguna knows what he means.

"Ohhh! I know what he means. He wants to make the final match into a pool party." Laguna said knowing of his sign language.

"A pool party?"

"When it comes to pool party and that means you have to party all night in the pool side especially they can take off their shirts just for fun when wet." Laguna said and he finally orders Dr. Odine. "Like Ward says, hit the music!"

"Yes!"

With that Ward points out on Squall who is sitting and rest because of what happened earlier as he begins to move and groove while taking off his tank top in a dancing spin with disco moves and claps as he makes a final pose, making everyone goes for an applause. Although the latter laughs to see him dance.

"..."

"Despite your size, you can still dance." Squall remarked happily as Ward makes a sign language as he's trying to tell about the pool party rules. "Okay, you mean to say that if it comes to the pool party rules and I had to take my shirt off and dance?"

Ward happily laughs as most audience chanting "Take it off!" much to Squall's disdain and his face became bright red as he hears their chants.

_How come most of the audience likes to take my shirt off? I have to stay as it is._

Therefore, Squall looked to see Quistis, Selphie and Ellone are talking about him.

"I wonder why the audience are chanting to say "take it off"?" Quistis wondered as Ellone laughs.

"Didn't you know they like Squall to take his shirt off? Everyone likes to show how hot he was without it, hahaha..."

"Really?!"

"Oh wow... I can't wait to see how hot and sexy Squall is." Selphie smiled in excitement as Rinoa became blush to hear them as they knew she was the one who saw him looking like this.

"Rinoa, your face is bright red. Don't tell me that you already saw him in shirtless too?" Quistis noticed how she was blushing upon mentioning this which she nervously replies to them.

"Uhhh! Come on, girls! You don't have to stare at me like that."

"HOTNESS!" Fujin arrives and wants to see how Squall can do all this in the finals.

"I guess Fujin likes to see him looking like that too." Quistis smiled making the girls giggle.

Squall became blushed in embarrassment when the girls are talking about him especially if they wanted to show him in a lesser outfit as he thought.

_Now that was a ridiculous situation. They really like me to show how bare I was without a shirt._

Ward tries to tell him by sign language as Squall translates his speech.

"You mean to say that if either of us win the title then? A DANCE sample?!"

"..." Ward made a double thumbs up knowing the finals will be ridiculous much to his disdain.

"What?! No, screw this!"

"It looks like Leonhart finally stands up after his opponent informs him about winning the title at the finals." Martine noticed Squall finally stands up as Laguna reveals it.

"Since this finals is wet and wild, I'd say if either of those two will win the title. They will have a dance sample. Quite frankly, Ward was trying to inform Squall about the entire thing."

"I guess now that both were about to continue their battle in whoever gets fall into the water."

Both now became serious once again as they charged each other head on. Ward tackles Squall who blocks both of his hands but he slips through the ground in a sitting position.

"Oww! That really hurts..." Squall tried to stand up while clutching his butt as Ward tried to catch him but he slides beneath him and going for a counter tackle almost knocking him.

"..."

Squall became serious to win the tournament until he became so weak as his sight goes blurry knowing he was pushing himself it to the limit as he thought.

_Not now... I can't lose this. If I collapsed and fell into the water below, I let the big guy win. Despite my condition, I must win it!_

Ward tries to catch him but Squall tackles him long enough to lose his balance. He continued to catch him again but he almost got him as he jumps, making him slip through the beam.

"You almost got me there, big guy." Squall looked at Ward who stands up as he tries to charge at him as he simply jumps to avoid getting caught. To his shock, he caught him off guard and noticing that he tricked him long enough for him to dodge.

"..."

"What the?!" Squall said shockingly as Dobe noticed about Ward's trump card.

"Looks like Zabac successfully grabbed his opponent from behind. Is this a legal move?"

"Basically, Ward grabs Squall, to think that he carries his signature harpoon." Laguna commented about the finals.

"Go on, Squall... you need to get out of there!" Zell tries to cheer him on.

"I'd never expect he tricks Squall into dodging the tackle." Irvine remarked about the fight as Kiros knew he could outsmart his opponent.

"Ward says that just because you can dodge and avoiding me because of your speed. Perhaps, throwing you to the water will be good."

"Squall, you have to hang on! Please win it for me!" Rinoa tries to cheer on him.

Ward lifts Squall similar to a bear hug as he tries to get free from it's grasp as he sneers at him.

"Just let me go! Don't ever dare try to throw me off into the water!"

Ward knows he wants to win the competition as he put him into the edge of the water. Squall doesn't want to lose the competition and became desperate to win as he thought.

_Dang it, I hate to lose the competition. I know I'm totally disdain because I don't want to take my shirt off. He's gonna throw me into the water like a javelin. I gotta do something... Or else..._

Ward tries to lift Squall in both hands, acting as a human javelin as he is ready to win the finals. Could Squall manage to get out of his grasp? Find out on the final chapter of this gag fic.


	11. The Conclusion

_**Final Round: **_The Conclusion

Ward tries to lift Squall in both hands, acting as a human javelin as he is ready to win the finals. As soon as he is about to throw him into the water below, he felt both of his hands went missing as he only carries was his white v-neck shirt, much to his horrible shock. When the comic music backgrounds has been played, seeing that Squall had outsmarted him again.

"It looks like Zabac got frustrated for a moment he lost his heavy lifting." Martine said as Dobe noticed his frustrations.

"Since the finals turns into a pool party, I'd say that this is a great match in the record books. The big man got frustrated knowing that he almost got him."

"Where's Squall?" Zell wondered as Irvine calmly replies.

"Hmmm... If the big guy got his shirt and that means he was still inside of this arena?"

The girls are trying to know where he is until Rinoa saw both of his hands were intact on the beam.

"I saw his hands, he's hanging on the beam. But in a different sides."

Ward stomps his feet in frustration after being outsmarted as he angrily threw the shirt. From behind, Squall was hanging on the beam in both hands, while in shirtless as he climbs back to the platform they were standing on and became dismayed to see him upset as he remarked him in disdain.

"You almost got me there, big guy. Let's finish this little game, shall we."

Squall immediately tackles Ward from behind, making him slip causing him to lose his balance as he was relief that he was almost on the edge. Without warning, Squall pushes him off into the water below by his left hand, finally wins the tournament.

"And they're you have it ladies and gentleman! Leonhart just beat Zabac in the finals! And therefore, he is the first ever one and only KING of men!" Martine finally declares Squall the victor after defeating Ward at the finals.

"Like the president just said earlier. If he gets the title of King of Men, he will have a dance sample. Just to show everyone about his hidden talent." Dobe happily informs about Laguna's word.

Most girls are screaming in attraction after seeing Squall in shirtless as well as Quistis, Selphie and Fujin causing Rinoa to get flustered to see him in his revealed appearance.

"Wow! I can't believe Squall was so hot!" Selphie became attracted to see him as Quistis excitedly smiles.

"This is the first time I've seen him like this..."

"HOTNESS!" Fujin became amused as Rinoa happily giggles to see him while her cheeks became rosier.

"It's like we always hang out alone together, tee hee."

Squall became blushed in embarrassment as most of the female audience are attracted to his revealed appearance as he thought while putting his left hand on his hip and shaking his head in annoyance.

_Urgh... Now the girls are thinking of me being a center of attraction. I know for sure, If I took my shirt off then the girls would be gone crazy to see me looking like this..._

Most audience try to chant "Sample!" knowing the victor would need to show their hidden talent, much to his annoyance while having his arm crossed. On the water below, Ward looked at him while giving him a thumbs up and seeing that he had no other choice. Squall became reluctant to see everyone likes to see his hidden talent since he wins the title. He tells Dr. Odine using sign language to hit the music as the song "Rock DJ" has been played. Squall finally dances to show off his sexiness much to the audiences' fun and excitement. He definitely shows his move and groove when he danced that music. Afterwards, he raises his hand as the entire disco lights open in the entire arena. Everyone is having a good time dancing like in a disco club as his comrades also do the same. Seifer continued to laugh so hard after seeing his rival doing a sexy dance as Fujin shrugs to see him like a laughing gas.

"Until next year, everyone! I bid you farewell!" Martine finally concludes the entire tournament while they continued dancing because of the disco music.

Following the tournament, Squall was given a towel by one of the Estharian guards to dry himself up as being reunited with his comrades and Rinoa hugs him, much to his delight.

"Congrats on winning, Squall. You did that for me."

"Yeah... I do it for you." Squall smiled as both continued to hug each other as Irvine makes an impression for his actions.

"That's the first time you made the entire arena into a disco ball especially being the first title reign as the strongest king."

"I wish if it has a disco dance the next time someone had a SeeD graduation like this." Zell wanted to have this after the graduation ball.

"Oh yeah... you simply push the big guy into the water while he lost his balance when you tackled him. Tell me about it, please..." Selphie likes to know how strong Squall is as he shakes his head as he thought.

_How can I tell her of how I became stronger these days. During my few months of disappearance, I keep swinging my gunblade so many times when I fight some dangerous enemies out there._

Before he could answer, he simply collapsed much to everyone's shock as Irvine touched his face and neck and realizing he was sick with high fever.

"Oh man! You're burning up, Squall."

"You were sick this entire time!" Zell shouted knowing that he keeps his sickness during the tournament.

"The ice cold blizzard just struck out on me during the second round of the tournament. So I pushed it too far to earn it." Squall said finally admits his actions as he sneezes.

"Looks like you had a flu, Squall." Quistis said knowing he was sick.

As the group tried to help him out, Laguna, Kiros, Ward and Ellone watch and seeing he was disappointed upon learning of his son's sickness. Ward was proud to see him competing in that tournament despite he was in a bad state.

The next day, Squall was seen in bedridden which he was staying at the Presidential Palace while having a cold towel on his forehead. Laguna came to visit him after yesterday's tournament and learning of his bad condition.

"Hey, dad..."

"I can't believe you, despite winning the first ever King of Men title and you didn't tell me that you had gotten sick in the second round of the tournament. I'm a little disappointed from your stubbornness." Laguna mildly scolds him as he informs him. "By the way, Headmaster Cid just called and he gave you a sick leave after what happened in the tournament."

_Finally, he gave me a sick leave. I'm so glad that I need a little recovery from this sickness._

"I'm sorry dad... I'd like to win this tournament and I don't want to let Rinoa down. I did this for her." Squall said finally apologizes for being stubborn as he gets up to reveal a pair of dark gray trousers as he looked at his father.

"Health is more important than fighting. You have to keep that in mind." Laguna said telling him as he looked to see Ward in an Estharian clothes.

"..."

"Squall, seems like your girlfriend was here to see you."

Rinoa arrives without her blue duster sweater and arm warmers and was happy to see him in shirtless as she carries a basket full of apples.

"How are you feeling, Squall? I'm glad that Dr. Odine gave you some flu medicine."

"Yeah... I'm fine... the high fever was down." Squall answered and laments about his main clothes. "I'd rather wear something more winter clothing than my current clothes if the endurance competition was an ice cold blizzard. But I catch cold after I noticed my shirt only reach through my waist and Raijin had already warned me to have my back exposed in the cold."

"..."

"The big guy says, your situation was fine at the tournament. If you don't get it the first time, just be prepared." Rinoa said while she translates his speech.

"Uhm... I'll just leave the three of you for a while. I got a lots of projects to do at my office." Laguna then leaves the scene and Ward gave Squall a fist bump after they gave their all at the finals of the tournament yesterday as Rinoa finally peels some apples for everyone to share.

"You brought apples, Rin."

"It's for you, Squall. You have to eat something healthy. I got so worried after you endure some dangerous obstacles in a tournament like this." Rinoa retorted as Ward eats a single apple to watch the couple to eat apples.

"Thank you, Rin. I'm glad that I can eat some fruits than the meals at the cafeteria." Squall became thankful and he mumbles to himself. "Despite my cold actions for being a loner before, I've never seen a lot of girls are gone crazy over me. But I'm remain faithful to Rinoa..."

As they share some apples together while Ward guards them, Laguna and Dr. Odine watch them and was relieved that they had a stock of flu medicine.

"Luckily, Piet gave you the flu medicine at the Lunar Base."

"Yes... I always keep this medicine pills in case if I catch cold with fever."

"Hmmm, you know what. If this tournament will be held again next year. This time with a lot of medical assistance and first aid." Laguna finally decided that the next year's tournament now have medical assistance and first aid and both continued to watch them eat apples.

* * *

**A/N: **This is the end of the gag fic. More gag fics for the Final Fantasy VIII characters will be posted very soon. Squall's gag reel in this entire 10-shot fic is all about his endurance because in the game, he was shown to be weak and fragile after being hit from Edea's Ice Strike Limit Break at the end of Disc 1, Seifer's electrical torture in the interrogation room of Galbadian D-District Prison at the beginning of Disc 2 and the rest of the scenes where he got knocked away from Rinoa's telekinesis at the Lunar Base during the events of Disc 3. In the Dissidia series, he was overpowered by Jecht from Final Fantasy X in a sword fight within the climax of Dissidia Final Fantasy NT. Well they're you have it. The next gag fic will be posted soon takes us back to their original ages in the game but still remains at the end of Ultimecia's defeat and their victory celebration. Happy reading everybody :D


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